The woman I thought I would be at the age of 20, if far from the woman I am at 30. It has been an insane journey, and the longer I live, the more insane it becomes.
In this case, insane isn't always bad, it's just....life...
As I sit here now, I feel somewhat broken. This blog, hopefully, will be about a journey, one that many of us have taken, but hardly ever feel comfortable talking about. The nitty griddy of who we are.
I have no clue who I actually am. I know the components, and I am fully aware of what I want to be to my husband and children, but am completely lost as to who I want to be, who is at my core.
What do I want my chiildren to remember about me and how I handled situations, and just life.
My childhood sure wasn't Norman Rockwell, was yours? Once I got married and had my own children, I foolishly thought the issues of my childhood would simply fall away....I talking about my mother, anyone have one like those?!
I hope you will follow me as I find a path to more peace and more awareness of teaching what I need to instill in my kids to avoid some of the heart ache I have expireanced.
Our kids learn by example. That much I do know. But what else I know is this...
I have not handled life with grace, or at least what has been thrown our way, which in all fairness, feels like alot. I want to show them how to better handle, and have a record of the journey it takes to get there.
My hope is, their journey to find the inner peace so much of us strive for, is not nearly as long as mine has been, or as filled with as many mountains in the way. Maybe my journey will help them.
I want them to know Mom isn't a superhero, and doesn't always have all the answers...
But....
Lessons number one....it's OK to not always have all the answers...
So here starts the journey....
No comments:
Post a Comment